The Heartache of Separation Anxiety in Teenage Relationships

Most parents expect the usual anxieties that come with their teenager starting to date; Will they be safe? Will they be respectful? What if they break up, and my child is devastated?

However, separation anxiety is often overlooked when your child can't bear to be away from their significant other for even a moment. While this may seem sweet and romantic, it can harm your teenager's development. 

For a more detailed explanation, Important Facts You Need To Know About Separation Anxiety in Teenage Relationships.

What is Separation Anxiety? 

Separation anxiety is "an anxious attachment style characterized by a desire to maintain proximity to an attachment figure." In other words, it's when someone feels like they need to be close to their loved one to feel secure. While this might not seem like a big deal initially, it can lead to severe consequences. 

How Does It Affect My Teenager's Development? 

When separation anxiety starts to take over, it can prevent your teenager from developing independence and strong relationships outside their current relationship. They might begin skipping important events with family or friends to spend more time with their partner.

If they're only ever around one person, they're not getting the chance to learn how to communicate and relate to others, which is an important skill to have in all areas of life. This can lead to social problems later on down the road.

Additionally, if your teenager constantly worries about their significant other leaving them, it can cause them stress and anxiety. Over time, this can lead to things like depression and substance abuse. 

How Can I Help My Teenager Deal With Separation Anxiety? 

If you're concerned that your teenager might be suffering from separation anxiety, the best thing you can do is talk to them about it. Ask them how they feel and why they think they feel this way. You must listen carefully and without judgment.

Once you've had a chance to hear them out, you can start working on some coping mechanisms together. Here are a few ideas: 

Encourage Them To Spend Time Apart

If your teenager is used to being around their partner all the time, spending time apart might seem scary at first. But they need to learn to be independent and enjoy their own company.

Try suggesting things like going for solo walks or taking up a new hobby they can do alone.  

Talk Through Their Fears

Many times, separation anxiety stems from irrational fears or assumptions. Help your teenager identify these by having open and honest conversations about their thoughts and feelings.

Afterward, you can work on reframing these thoughts in a more positive light. For instance, instead of thinking, "My partner will leave me if I'm not around," your teenager could think, "I am capable of being independent, and my partner loves me no matter what." 

Encourage Them To Seek Professional Help

If you feel like your teenager's separation anxiety is starting to take over their life or preventing them from developing healthy relationships, encourage them to seek professional help from a therapist or counselor specializing in teenage anxiety and relationships.

Learn more about another anxiety disorder High Functioning Anxiety: What is it?

Conclusion

Though it is often unspoken, teenage relationships are some of the most passionate and challenging to maintain.

Much of this has to do with separation anxiety; when we are away from our partner, we experience physical discomfort that can be difficult to ignore or break free from.

If you or someone you know is struggling with separation anxiety in a relationship, resources are available to help. For more information on this topic, read our blog post, Important Facts You Need To Know About Separation Anxiety in Teenage Relationships.

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